The One with The Rumor
by JiminyBillyBob
Summary: One where Ichigo was humiliated, Rukia was oblivious, and Renji was amused. "Ok, the rumor says what?" The path of love is never smooth. One shot. IchiRuki.


_**A/N:** (Note: I edited a few things.)Hey guys! I am back with a story! Haha been a long time. Anyway, Bleach belongs to Tite Kubo. I am messing with characters once again. (slight note: Rukia's hair is her old hair in this story. I just miss her old hair lol and the title idea came from F.R.I.E.N.D.S) Enjoy! hope you like it =D_

**_The One with The Rumor_**

* * *

Ichigo had never felt this humiliated. The girl of his dream had just asked something that deeply hurt his manly pride. The girl of his dream had just asked-

"Ok, the rumor says what?"

"You are gay?" Rukia said, making it sound like half question, half statement.

The girl that he had been secretly in love with had just asked if he was-

"What?"

"As in, you're into guys."

The girl whom he was going to confess his feelings to (still waiting for the right time because he was too afraid to risk everything they were having now) had just asked him WHAT-

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Rukia sighed. "Pertaining to, or exhibiting sexual desire or behavior directed toward a person or persons of one's own gender and-"

"I know what it is, Rukia! Just what the hell?"

Even though his ears were burning from anger and confusion and embarrassment, Ichigo swore he could hear Renji's snickers.

That. Bastard.

"You know, Ichigo, you're... you're having this kind of signs..." Rukia said.

Renji finally snapped. His loud mocking laughs erupted.

Ichigo gave him a death glare.

"Just admit it, Ichigo," Renji said between snickers. "We totally understand."

"What signs?" Ichigo turned to Rukia. His scowl was deeper than any sea in the world combined.

"First, you are forever alone. And you don't seem like you're looking for a girlfriend." Rukia said it in I'm-a-kuchiki-and-I-know-everything tone.

"You are alone too."...and she better not looking for boyfriend right now or he was going to kick some ass.

A minute of silence, then an awkward laugh escaped Rukia's mouth, followed by "I'm sorry that's a shitty argument."

"Ok, first, you're like... you never look at girls." Rukia answered calmly.

"I look at you."

Her captivating violet eyes.

Her white, pale, soft skin.

Her shoulder length smooth hair.

Her lips.

Her nice legs-ok. Stop there, Kurosaki. Stop _right there_. Damn testosterone.

Rukia's mouth gaped slightly and in a millisecond Ichigo thought hecould see her blush.

"Smooth, Kurosaki..." Renji snickered again.

This time, Ichigo threw a thick medical study book at him.

"L-Look like_ that way_, stupid. You know what I mean."

"No, I don't." Ichigo said, challenging her.

"Let me break it down for you. Yoruichi-san happened to tell Nii-sama, then Nii-sama told Renji, then Renji told me, Rangiku-san, Ikkaku-san, Yumichika-san, Kyouraku-taichou and practically everyone in the bar, that Yoruichi-san transformed right in front of you and you just freaked out. You weren't even interested! Then everyone started to put pieces and pieces together and we came to a speculation that...yes, Ichigo, we think you're gay." Rukia rambled.

"WHAT. That was billion years ago-" he paused, as if his brain just absorbed Rukia's words, "Holy shit, your brother spread this?"

Rukia shrugged and looked at the window instead. Clearly regretted her slip of tongue.

"We were doing paperwork and Taichou suddenly said to me, 'Renji, I was reliably informed that Kurosaki Ichigo likes men'. Just like that." Renji chuckled, reminiscing the memory.

Rukia rolled her eyes. "Renji, you gotta stop telling people that story because it sounds like Nii-sama wants YOU to know that Ichigo is gay so you'll make a move on him."

The orange haired shinigami eyed the blushing Renji darkly and made their distance farther.

"Damn you." Renji mumbled incoherently.

"In my defense, Rukia," Ichigo said her name (rather) softly and saying each syllables slowly, "I was just being a gentleman who respected woman. Thank you very much."

Renji snorted and threw Ichigo his soul pager but Ichigo dodged it easily.

Rukia sighed. "Alright, but in high school, when Keigo and Mizuiro talked about girls, you never had a say, like it was taboo or something. But when they were talking about how they thought Ishida was gay, you were the most excited one!"

"I was not excited, idiot! I hated Ishida. It was natural if I made fun of him."

Renji's laughter could wake the whole dead Espadas in Hueco Mundo from the dead right now. "Yeah... Ishida. Definitely gay."

Ichigo smirked. "I know. That freak sews."

If Ichigo didn't look that good with that smirk on his face, Rukia would have punched his face.

"Fine, Mr. Macho. But that didn't explain why you like tight pants. Or rejecting those girls on Valentine's Day back in High School. Or the fact that ladies at Sereitei bar threw their selves on you and you just stood still like a statue."

Renji was now rolling the floor. Ichigo's humiliated face was such an entertainment for him.

"And to add my point, Ichigo, you never find a girl attractive."

Oh how naïve she is.

Ichigo swore he could pull this smoldering look better if there was no stupid Renji laughing like a maniac in the background.

"Really?"

"Y-yeah. You-" Rukia stuttered. (Stutter means his smolder was slowly working).

"Because I think I find you beautiful, Rukia." He smirked.

_Ugh. _

That smirk.

That arrogant, annoying smirk.

As oblivious as a Kuchiki could ever be, Rukia thought Ichigo was joking. He couldn't be serious. After all, it was Ichigo.

So, she sarcastically responded with her fake cheerful high school voice, "that's really sweet, Ichigo honey. I'm totally buying that."

Ichigo scowled deeper. She was never taking his words seriously for God's sake. How could he ever make a move on her. God forbid.

He was in bad mood now and Renji's whisper of 'Geez, Ichigo, it would have gone better if your face wasn't like that!' really wasn't helping.

"And Ichigo," Rukia began again. "the last point I've discovered is that you have a _bromance_ with Chad."

"My freaking _bromance_ with-"

"-and when you talk to Rangiku-san, you're looking at the sky." Renji cut Ichigo off.

Ichigo slapped his forehead. "Maybe, the sky is goddamn blue. And maybe, Rangiku-san isn't just my type."

This time, Rukia laughed.

Oh how Ichigo loved her laugh. It was like a melody in his ears (blame reading too much Shakespeare's books).

"Excuse me, did you say your type?" Rukia laughed some more. "Enlighten me." She smirked (and Ichigo wondered how come she could be an angel in one time then changed into wicked evil in a mere second).

"Black silky hair, beautiful eyes, pale-white skin, shorter than me-"

"Oh my God, Ichigo," Rukia gasped.

Please, tell me you know it is you.

Her expression softened. But then Ichigo realized it was worry on her face.

"Please tell me you're not describing Hanatarou right now."

Hanatarou, my ass.

If Aizen was still alive, he would gladly ask that psycho to kill him right now. And probably ask him to kill Renji too because that red stupid freak was laughing hysterically in the background.

Then once he was calm, Renji thought maybe his fellow buddy here might need some back up.

"You know, Rukia, do you know what else adds to Ichigo's type?"

Ichigo gritted his teeth. "Shut up, Renji. Shut up_ now_."

Rukia raised one eyebrow before answering, "_No_?"

Renji grinned. "A Kuchiki."

Ichigo looked away, fearful of what her response might be. There was no way she wasn't getting it now. She couldn't be that oblivious. Right,  
_RIGHT-_

Was that disappointment on her face?

"Oh."

Oh. _Oh._

"Ichigo, I don't think my brother will be delighted to hear this."

Who cares about that bastard brother of hers. Ichigo was about to say_ 'love will conquer all'_ but before he opened his mouth, he heard Rukia say-

"Ichigo, you... you are not Nii-sama's type."

Renji was dying in laughter (in hope that the red baboon was going to choke and die) and Ichigo was definitely going to sulk.

And by sulking, it means not talking to Rukia for the_ whole_ two weeks.

_The path of love is never smooth._

* * *

**END.**

_**A/N:** Review? tell me what you think! Thanks =D_

* * *

"If this helps you feel better, although she denied it, she was heartbroken when this rumor spread."

"..."

"Ichigo, you okay?"

"..."

"Want a brother hug?"

"...ok."


End file.
